Blood on my hands
by skittleAcullen
Summary: The Doctor, the man who keeps on running, never looking back because he dare not, out of shame. This is my final victory, Doctor. I have shown you yourself. - Davros 7 ish shot maybe my OC T for language


_**disclamiar- i own nothing enjoy my angst R&R let me kno if theres any mistakes **_

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There's one thing I always meant to ask Jack. Back in the old days. I wanted to know about that Doctor of his. The man who appears out of nowhere and saves the world. Except sometimes he doesn't. All those times in history when there was no sign of him, I wanted to know why not. But I don't need to ask any more. I know the answer now. Sometimes the Doctor must look at this planet and turn away in shame. - Gwen

The man who abhors violence, but this is the truth: you take ordinary people and fashion them into weapons... How many have died in your name? The Doctor, the man who keeps on running, never looking back because he dare not, out of shame. This is my final victory, Doctor. I have shown you yourself. - Davros

_"I dreamed I was missing_

_You were so scared_

_But no one would listen_

_Cause no one else cared_

The girl sat on the couch of the tacky office, listening to her therapist talk to her about nothing. She nodded at appropriate times not really listening to the man in the chair. Instead she let her eyes wander around the room. She noted that the room was three different tones of blue and 5 different shades of green she felt like she was in a bag of mold. The thought made her smile, which her therapist took as a sign that he was doing a good job. Her eye twitched wishing he would stop his incessant chirping. He was to happy go lucky for her taste after she was 14 and she sure as hell wasn't preppy

" Damn it Alexis!" the man said snapping her out of her numb thoughts

" What did I do?' she wondered out loud

" You've tried my patience," he snapped looking at her

She raised an eyebrow

' Im sitting here chatting away like an idiot…"

" You look like one with that bow tie on" she smirked

" Bow ties are cool!" he blew up and Alexis just smiled

" You don't get it do you" she said " I LOVE this there is nothing wrong with me, what do you think of me John?" she asked " let me tell you" she said standing up " you think im a stupid teenage girl you assume that im Goth cuz im wearing black am I right? You assume my IQ is below level because my grades aren't the best. You take me for a joke you assume I know nothing about you don't you?"

_After my dreaming I woke with this fear what am I leaving when I'm done here?_

By now we were both standing, his eyes lit up with surprise and the childish delight that only he could have at a moment like this.

" Tell me my dear Doctor have you figured it out yet?"

" Figured what out" he demanded

" Oh my god you don't know do you?" she asked laughing a cold laugh " aren't you supposed to be clever? The song doctor the song" just then "Mark" and Jack came into the room concerned looks on their faces

" Oh well here comes memory lane" she laughed " if it isn't the Master and Captain Jack?"

" I don't know…"

" Oh stuff it Doctor! I ALREADY KNOW EVERYTHING!" she screamed in his face exploding showing real emotion for the first time all day. She was so happy to finally get this out " the Doctor" she spat "protector of earth destroyer of gallifrey" she said a lone tear running down her cheek " oh beautiful gallifrey it deserved so much more, It would have achieved so much more, It could have done so. Much. MORE." she screamed letting the tears flow freely not holding anything back refusing to look anywhere but the doctors shocked eyes

_so if you're asking me I want you to know_

" It wasn't his fault," The Master whispered and that broke her anger. She took a step back with a gasp of surprise and turned to them opening her mouth to say something and couldn't say anything she fell back on the couch pulling my knees up to my chest still crying

_When my time comes_

_Forget the wrong that I've done_

_Help me leave behind some_

_Reasons to be missed_

" How do you know so much?" Jack asked

_and don't resent me_

_And when you're feeling empty_

_Keep me in your memory_

" When you guys landed in America" she started "you landed next to my house and I watched you guys step out in wonder thinking to myself " there's no way in hell they could be here""

" But why" master asked " how do you know of us?"

" Cuz you're a bloody TV show" she spat at him " I know everything about each and everyone one of you, you're in the wrong universe" she said turning to jack

_Leave out all the rest Leave out all the rest_

" Captain Jack Harkness ex time agent from the 51st century" Alexis said in a monotone voice " currently working at torchwood three with Gwen Cooper, Owen Harper, Tosh sako, and Ianto Jones you hunt aliens and retcon witnesses"

_Don't be afraid_

_I've taken my beating _

_I've shed but I made_

then she turned to Master

" The Master the perfect warrior, how are the drums?" she asked

" Gone as you probably already know" The Master said steel in his eyes

" But there's something new isn't there" she didn't give him time to reply

" Your right I do know the sound went back into the time war with the rest of hell" she snorted " I am sorry for your loss doctor and I shouldn't have blown up but as you should know I've lost much recently"

_I'm strong on the surface_

_Not all the way through_

_I've never been perfect _

_But neither have you_

" What is she talking about?" Jack asked

" She lost her whole family recently in a fire a building exploded or something" he said kind of brushing it off

_so if you're asking me_

_I want you to know_

She shot off the couch like a bat outa hell she was in the Doctor's face staring him in the eyes

" The building was blown up by you" she said venom leaking from every fiber of her being

_When my time comes_

_Forget the wrong that I've done_

_Help me leave behind some_

_Reasons to be missed_

" when you were saving jack and you threw the boom down the street you hit my house" she said not feeling the least bit of emotion as she watched tears spill down the Doctors face

_Don't resent me_

_And when you're feeling empty_

_Keep me in your memory_

" Why the fuck are you crying?" she asked in a whisper "my family died yesterday because of you and your fucking adventures." She hissed crying again " I blame you for this doctor" she said stepping back

_Leave out all the rest Leave out all the rest_

" Don't blame him" jack said "if anything…"

" No" she hissed " it's the Doctors fault so add that to your list Doctor, family killer, destroyer of the Daleks, the oncoming storm, the man who watched Gallifrey burn, you're a God Doctor" she said stepping back amazement in her eyes

_ Forgetting_

_All the hurt inside_

_You've learned to hide so well_

He shook his head unable to speak " but you are Doctor your this amazing evil person. You kill and bring life, you help and you hurt, you save millions by killing one or is that Jack?" she asked " how's Alice?" Jack didn't say anything but a tear ran down his face alexis turned back to the Doctor "you Doctor are a God, A vengeful God the one and only lonely God wandering the cosmos trying not to be alone. The Doctor, the man who keeps on running, never looking back because he dare not, out of shame. This is my revenge, Doctor. I have shown you yourself."

_Pretending_

_Someone else can come and save me from myself _

_I can't be who you are_

" How do you know all this" Jack asked walking with the Master over to the Doctor

_When my time comes_

_Forget the wrong that I've done_

_Help me leave behind some _

_Reasons to be missed_

" You know how they say dead men tell no tales?" she asked Jack nodded

_don't resent me_

_And when you're feeling empty _

_Keep me in your memory_

" They were wrong" then she was gone leaving behind a song that would haunt them for the rest of their lives.

_Leave out all the rest_

_Leave out all the rest_

Mostly The Doctor. The other two only heard it on certain nights, but The Doctor heard it every hour every waking and sleeping hour. It was the girl's purgatory. She wasn't like the others he soon found out.

_Leave out all the rest_

_Leave out all the rest_

Purgatory is for people who were killed by someone. People in purgatory have two choices. Do nothing and await judgment from there creator or exact revenge and go straight to hell. The girl chose revenge and didn't try to kill the Doctor and friends. no she hurt them for the rest of there exist for as long as they are alive in some way shape or form they would never forget what they did to her. sometimes she talked to him. she told him of how she used to worship him, how everyday at 5 O'clock she would watch his show like it was a fucking religion but only now did she realize how much she wasted on him. and he had no choice but to listen. always hearing the girls beautiful voice singing to him, making him cry and tearing out his hearts.

_Forgetting_

_All the hurt inside_

_You've learned to hide so well_

_Pretending_

_Someone else can come and save me from myself_

_I can't be who you are_

_I can't be who you are"_

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**probably wont be more unless i get requests or i think of one **_


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